27-year-old fathers 4 children by 4 mothers, his parents praise him for being responsible: 'I take care of my kids. None of their moms have to struggle.'

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  • Man wearing gray dress shirt leaning on brown wall
  • Am I wrong for telling my brother he needs to stop getting women pregnant like it’s a hobby?

    I (F24) have an older brother (M27) who's always been a little too confident for his own good. He's got a solid job, makes good money, and loves to talk about how "he takes care of his responsibilities." And to be fair, he does take care of his kids financially, at least.
  • He's got three kids by three different women, and his current girlfriend of two years is pregnant with their fourth. Every time someone mentions it, he acts like it's something to be proud of like he's building a legacy instead of a mess.
  • My parents baby him way too much. They always go on about how he's "stepping up" and "doing the right thing," but honestly, I'm over it. He's not a bad guy, but he keeps making the same mistake over and over and everyone just shrugs it off because he's not broke.
  • M mom started talking about how "it's a blessing” that he's such a devoted father. I couldn't help myself. I said, "He's not devoted he's just consistent at knocking women up. At this rate, he'll need a group chat just to schedule Father's Day."
  • The room got quiet. My brother laughed at first, but then he said, "You don't understand, I take care of my kids. None of their moms have to struggle."
  • Woman in black dress carrying in pink dress
  • I told him, "That's great, but maybe you should stop giving out child support before you run out of checks. Being a good dad doesn't mean you have to keep creating new families."
  • A person holding a baby
  • He didn't yell or storm out he just gave me this annoyed look and said, "You really don't get it," and went back to eating. My parents told me later I was "out of line" and that I should've kept my mouth shut because "he's doing fine."
  • But I don't think he is fine. He's 27 with four kids by four different women. How is that fine? AITA for telling my brother that just because he can afford his choices doesn't mean he should keep making them?
  • Bearliz NTA. I hope he never loses his job or he will be in a pickle.
  • Original_Rent7677 If he meets someone he wants to settle down with he will be in a pickle. Who would want a long term relationship with him paying for 4 kids with 4 baby mamas? Imagine the drama.
  • Glittering Win_9677 It doesn't sound like he's the settling down type though.
  • Telvin3d He's 27. Watch him turn 30 and see his peers building serious, substantial, lives. Also, the older he gets the more the interesting women are going to have their sh together, and have expectations. Despite stereotypes most guys don't actually want to spend their lives dating a string of 24 year olds
  • ItsNotMelts Your Bussy In many high paying jobs, to progress further up the company, execs like to see a reliable person with a respectable family unit. Not a fistful of baby mamas. So he might end up getting screwed then too
  • mrdannyg21 Yeah he is being wildly irresponsible. He doesn't have endless millions, if he loses his job, that's 4 kids (and counting) that may be going hungry. Not to mention, he's only 'stepping up' financially. I very much doubt that he is an active, present parent to each of these kids. And
  • presumably, these moms didn't all knowingly and happily sign up to be single parents (it's possible they did, just seems unlikely), suggesting he's broken commitments to them. You don't raise a kid by just throwing money at it.
  • Smitten-kitten83 Even if all your kids are with one person, 4 is pushing it in my opinion. Kids deserve more than just financial support. Each kid deserves love and attention. The more you have the harder it is to satisfy those needs. I am the oldest of 10 and I absolutely love my siblings but it was a selfish decision on my mom's part.
  • Itsa TheMal Wow that's unhinged being a good parent has NOTHING to do with sending financial support is that what he thinks? He's spreading fatherless kids
  • Holly1010Frey Unless hes sending 2,000$ a month to each women he isn't financially supporting anyone. Hes just off setting some of the cost. Childcare alone can be 1,500$ let alone any sports the kid wants to play, if they want to play an instrument or go in any trips. There is no way those woman are not struggling.
  • Fennac A Good father would be able to list each child's day to day routine, school and teachers, doctors, friends etc. he would know what they like, their fav foods and shows and books. He would know them beyond surface level.
  • grayblue_grrl NTA... But your brother isn't "making mistakes". He's doing it on purpose because he thinks he's as special as his mommy thinks and has always told him he is.
  • HE probably thinks he's doing these women FAVOURS by getting them pregnant. And the gf of 2 years falls into the trap too? She's just stupid. It's all going to fall apart because he sure as h_l isn't giving anyone quality time.
  • Teamtunafish There is a certain amount of narcissistic behavior here.

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